Several years ago, I wrote a post about emotions and how it’s okay to have them. I believe that it’s important to have them, they’re there for a specific reason. They are a very important part of our healing process. They act as a guide.
Throwback Thoughts about Emotions
I take pride in being the happy and always optimistic one in the bunch. So much pride that I find myself not allowing myself to feel hurt, feel sad, or to feel angry. But being optimistic doesn’t mean we shouldn’t feel other emotions. Being optimistic means seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, it means knowing fully in your heart that it will be okay, no matter what you’re facing.
We need to feel all of our emotions. We need to allow them to process, to run their course, and to pass through us. Each emotion has its purpose. Each part of our mind’s, our heart’s, our soul’s healing. If we skip moving through them the process cannot ever fully complete. Being sad or being angry doesn’t mean I am a downer, it doesn’t mean I’ve lost hope, it’s just what I’m feeling. Relish each emotion in its moment, feel it deeply in your soul, and then let it go. Let it drift off.
As you travel through each emotion, remind yourself, “Everything is temporary. This shall too pass”, and then everything will be okay.
The Healing Process
Each of us will have a slightly varied healing process but this part will be pretty closely the same. We all have emotions and feelings.
It’s okay to need to sit in your room cry, scream – express your emotions. These emotions need to be released. This is your first step in your healing process. This is you accepting the situation and how it feels to you.
Now that you have accepted the emotions and feelings and you’ve given into feeling them, this is where the work begins.
*Side note – I know managing feelings and emotions is hard work, absolutely exhausting, but that’s just it – we are constantly trying to manage our feelings. Let them flow. Not all over the place but flow into a safe space.
First Steps
If you’re feeling stuck with heartache, these are good first steps for everyone. The details will vary but the structure for the healing process is the same.
Make a list of activities that are soothing to you. Prioritize the list, what makes you feel the best? Put these at the top of your list. For me, this is painting or taking a hike. Physically write out or type up this list.
Call someone that feels safe where you can share your feelings. This is the person that you can call bawling, yelling, or whatever. You feel safe and never worry about being judged.
Do something off of your soothing list.
Grab your journal and write out all your thoughts and your current feelings. Your mind should be starting to move through different thoughts now, as you start to release different barriers and emotions.
Repeat the above four. Repeat again. Keep repeating.
Meet Your LoveBlog 2020 Hosts:
Brita Long is the pink and sparkly personality behind the Christian feminist lifestyle blog, Belle Brita. On her blog and social media, you’ll discover more than authentic storytelling–she’s brutally honest about pursuing a fulfilling and joyful life even with Crohn’s Disease and depression.
Laura is a part-time artist hoping to go full time someday. She has a little black bucket list book filled with adventures. She writes with the hope to inspire. She’s known to be quite the workaholic sometimes. She’s an INTJ- A and she believes a cup of hot tea can solve almost anything. She embraces perseverance. She’s spent a lot of time emerged in self-discovery practices over the last several years and finds she is still learning as she goes. She is here in the blogging world because she believes the buzz about self-care, wellness, and self-love needs to be heard. You can also find her writing over at www.blogfivebiz.com chatting about blogging and business stuff.
Britta blogs over at the Bright And Bold Life about her journey as Jesus-follower, wife, church planter, environmentalist and maker. She recently moved from the UK to Berlin with her husband to be invovled with a new churchplant. Her recipe for a good day includes coffee, bookshops, nature walks and knitting needles.
this too shall pass… This has helped me through a lot. Great piece.
I totally agree with this little ‘story’ and I applaud you for sharing it here! Breathing and being in the moment is so important to getting through it. THanks , and have a great holiday! xxx Bee
Thank you, you as well! <3
Excellent advice for accepting our feelings and then healing from them. Sometimes you really do just need to sit with your emotions and allow yourself to feel the full extent of them, even when they hurt. Only then can you heal from them.
Yeah, I am an expert at pushing down my emotions, I am learning more and more that it is ok to have them! I love the idea of the ‘soothing list’. I will get onto writing one of those!
Many of us are really good at shoving those emotions down. Unfortunately, that’s not very healthy. I learned first hand, after years of shoving down, I finally broke and I was so burnt out emotionally that I became really ill. That was a very big wake up call…and yes I absolutely argued with the therapists about having emotions. But in the end, they knew what they were talking about – it is okay to have them!
Def try the soothing list! It’s a great go-to on a particularly bad day too!
“Repeat the above four. Repeat again. Keep repeating.” This is so key. We live in a microwave world and believe everything has a 3-minute fix. But you are so right. We need to keep repeating what is good to counteract the repeated bad stuff that keeps showing up. Sooooo good…xoxox